Friday, June 4, 2010

If I Could Speak From My Heart . . .

Revival is not something you can really tell someone about. It cannot even be shown to someone. It is something that has to be experienced for oneself. In the same sense, a burden for revival cannot really be explained to someone. As fervently as you may try to put it into words, it cannot really be expressed to its fullness. The only way to truly express a burden for revival is by crying out to a Holy God in prayer. He most certainly understands. He is the one who placed the burden in your heart.

The last couple of weeks here in Vanuatu, my burden has seemed to heighten. It is as if I cannot rest fully at night. I cannot think clearly during the day. My heart is crying out to my mind the desperate need for revival in this place.

I have felt the Spirit of God in the services. I have also grieved at the lack of tarrying in the altars. I ask myself, “Have they ever really experienced revival?” or “Do they even know how to seek for it?” My husband was kind enough to remind me of the Topeka, Kansas revival and how those young people had not experienced it, and yet sought for it.

A new thought entered my mind. Every year since I can remember, I have had an oasis. Be it Straight Paths Youth Camp as a girl, or OBI’s Convocation in later years, there has always been a place where I knew men and women of God were seeking for revival. In these times, I knew that if I could just get to those meetings then maybe, just maybe, I could glean from their experience and walk away with an experience of my own. Although I always prayed for these meetings, I knew that men and women of God far superior in dedication than I had paid the price through tears and time on their knees for me and others like me to experience revival.

These were men and women with a burden and a passion for my soul. How much I owe them!
Now God has called me to the ministry, more specifically, to the country of Vanuatu. I am in a place where I cannot pray for a people to experience revival once again, because I don’t know if they have or have not really experienced it the first time.

So here I am without my usual oasis. If I am to experience revival this year, I will have to find it on my own, without the camps or convocations. However, it is not enough for me alone to experience personal revival. I long, I crave - there is not a word to even describe the way I desire to see the Ni Van people captured by the presence of the Almighty God.

In all of this, I realize how many missionaries have spent a lifetime in one place and never had the opportunity to see revival in their country. It may not be during this two year term that I see God move in the way I so desire. But it is it with great rejoicing I can say, I know that the God I serve is able!

God is not bound by man, so I ask God: “If it is possible, let me see your Spirit fall here in a way that, not only they have never seen, but in a way we have never seen. For truly we are all in need of revival, and if you should wait to pour out your Spirit in this place when I am no longer here, I still want to thank you in advance, for You are the One who gives the increase, and You are the only One who can do the work in the hearts of your people. I ask that we never be afraid to ask for a mighty move from You, because I know it is but a small thing for You to do. I thank You for bringing me here, and ask that I may be a light to some hurting soul today. It is in Your name I ask this, Jesus. Amen.

Jennifer

1 comment:

  1. You are such an inspiration to me! Love & prayers! Sarah

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