Have you ever had the feeling that you were being stretched? Not the stretch of muscle and tendons, but the tension that comes when your mind is forced to learn new things. Since I have been here in Vanuatu, I have had that feeling constantly!
Back in the States, there were so many things that I took for granted. Driving an automatic transmission vehicle being one of them! Now I know that this may seem trivial to some of you, but here in Vanuatu, where automatic transmissions are as rare as seeing snow, I had to learn to drive a standard transmission. This meant that I had to learn to drive all over again! Not only did I have to learn a new language and adapt to a new culture, but I also had to go back and re-learn something I thought I already knew.
Though my driving has smoothed out a lot in the last weeks, I am afraid I have already gained a reputation and stigma that will last for many years to come! But, through all of my stalls and missed gears, my lurches and jolts, I have learned one thing for sure: Fear not! If you live, things will get better!
When I first started driving the standard, I was a ball of nerves. There were so many new things that had to be done, and done just right, in a certain order! Then there was the clutch. Don't get me started on the clutch!! But soon, I learned that if I stalled, the truck could be started again, and all the weird and wonderful noises the truck was making were not all my fault. Some of them were perfectly natural!
Learning to drive a standard was stretching for me. In a way, it was a lot like learning a new culture. Mistakes will be made and people will laugh or look at me as if I am a complete idiot! I will reach those times where I feel I have stalled out and am afraid to restart the engine. The stretching may seem like too much at times. But in the end, I am still alive and I can still learn to do better!
God has been right here beside me, telling me to give it one more try. He has been that encourager in the passenger seat! I am sure that all of you who have ever learned to drive a standard know Him!! When we stall or lurch forward in backbreaking spasms, He is the one who, when the car finally rattles to a halt, hides His smile and says, "Okay, let's try again!"
All through my transition, God has been right here with me. He is the author of the stretching. He sees down the road so much farther than I can see, and He knows how much I need to stretch in order that I might fit His pattern later on. I am not afraid to be stretched, be it learning the ins and outs of a standard transmission, or adapting to a new culture.
Tonight when I drove home from church, without a single lurch or jolt, I realized just how far I have come. I am now free to drive wherever I need to without the fear of getting in over my head! Although the cultural adaption is not going as speedily as learning to drive a standard, I know my God is still right beside me, hiding His smile. Though I still have a few stalls and lurches to go through, He remains the author of the stretching. I know that He knows exactly which way I need to be pulled and pried in order to become what He needs me to be.
So, Lord, I am still alive. Stretch on!!
Nathan
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